TWITTER …..AS YOU LIKE IT !

Twitter

is a social media site where a tweeter (user) answers the question: “What are you doing?” in 140 characters or less.

His tweets (answers/replies) are posted in the general input box that can be seen by his followers in the public time line.

A lot of them tweeter’s tweets remind me of the radio soap operas of the old days where a blow by blow account of what the character is doing is described graphically. Complete with sound effects  they feed the imagination with a vivid pictorial of the scene.

These tweets may sound stupid or just plain goofy nonsense  to others….(so what if you are having pizza now? do u need to announce it to the whole world to enjoy it?)

But whether a tweet is a manifestation of a speech impediment or a
grave psychological problem a low-wattage brain power… doesn’t matter.

Twitter  was created to be a fun site. Even as it is now has succumbed to commercialism, most of the time there are real good tweets that pop up  and serve its basic  purpose… fun.

Listen to these:

Logged in to twitter. 6:54 AM Dec 31st 2008 from web

Just woke up. 6:55 AM Dec 31st from web

I went to bed last night as any straight man does. But this morning,

a funny thing happened. I woke up GAY……

And now I’m  gay and don’t know why. 6:56 AM Dec 31st  from web

I’m going to brush my teeth.  6:57 AM  Dec 31st from web

Finished brushing my teeth.  7:05 AM Dec 31st 2008 from web

I just can’t get over myself.  7:08 AM  Dec 31st from web

So my first day being gay is a little weird….

Instead of going deer hunting today as scheduled,

I styled my wife’s hair.  2:29 PM Dec 31st from web

My wife liked her new hairstyle. 12:30 PM Dec 31st from web

Here is another thread:

I’m typing a twitter post.  4:40 AM Jan 5th 2008 from web

Thinking about going downstairs.  4:42 AM Jan 5th 2008 from webm>

Getting ready to go downstairs.  4:42 AM Jan 5th 2008 from web

Going downstairs now. Keep following my tweets to see how everything turns out.
4:45 AM Jan 5th from web

Put a  bag of popcorn on  d microwave and pressed start.  4:53 AM Jan 5th from web

Taking a deep breath.  4:55 AM Jan 5th from web

Popcorn is not finished yet. 30 seconds left. 4:56 AM Jan 5th from web

Exhaling. 5:01 AM Jan 5th from web

Gone back upstairs … I sat down to type this while eating my popcorns. 5:05 AM Jan 5th from web

Here is another one:

Listening to classical music. …making sure you know so you’ll think I’m sophisticated.
1:40 PM Jan 11th  from web

My wife came home from the store with a 24 roll package of Kleenex.

Be grateful for toilet paper. Consider the alternatives if you had none.
2:04 PM  Jan 11th from web

I’m standing up now.  2:05 Jan 11th  from web

Going to make love to my wife…. brb… 2:07 PM Jan 11th from web

Finished making love.  2:10 Jan 11th from web

(u made love in 3 minutes? – i asked,  in reply to his tweet)

@mizdi I can actually make love in 2-1/2 minutes because

I’m all about efficiency and time management.  2:13 PM Jan 11th from web in reply to mizdi

shaving my face.  3:57 PM Jan 11th from web

Shaving my neck.  4:01 PM Jan 11th from web

Finished shaving. 4:05 PM Jan 11th from web

I’m going to step outside.  4:13 PM Jan 11th from web

Getting ready to yawn.  4:15 PM Jan 11th from web

Finished yawning. 4:16 PM Jan 11th from web

Damn, I’m smooth. 6:43 PM Jan 11th from web

I mean ..I’m *really* smooth.  6:46 PM Jan 11th from web

And another one:

Turned my head 45 degrees to the left and then back again to it’s normal orientation.
5:02 PM Jan 9th from web

I know judo, karate, aikido and five other Japanese words.  5:03 PM Jan 9th from web

I am about to embark on a journey to the grocery store.

I will buy all kinds of delicious foods.  5:05 PM Jan 9th from web

Reminder to followers: keep following me as I lead you to the promised land.
5:10 PM Jan 9th from web

I’m back.. eating saltine crackers.  6:21 PM Jan 9th from web

From  a new follower:

@mizdi hey miz.. I heard you like twitter so

I retweeted your tweets  so you can read your tweets while u twitter
6:46 PM Jan 8th from web

You laugh because I’m different…I laugh cause I just farted.  6:51 PM Jan 8th from web

My neck is itchy, thinking I will scratch it.  7:06 PM Jan 8th from web

I’m scratching my neck. Finished scratching. Itching is gone. 7:06 PM Jan 8th from web

Just finished up typing another twitter post. I used up all 140 characters,

a first in my twitter career! 7:10 PM Jan 8th from web

Also a new follower:

Watching scary movie with friends. It’s scary part now! 7:51 PM Jan 8th from web

@mizdi OMG! The real killer is waiting for her! “Don’t open that door! ”
8:06 PM Jan 8th from web  in reply to mizdi

And from someone I just followed:

Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer. 7:57 PM Jan 18th from web

I maybe spending too much time on twitter. 8:07 PM Jan 18th from web

Sorry to leave you hanging. I went downstairs and brewed a cup of tea.

I’ll take a shower soon and reflect on my day of twitting. 8:27 PM Jan 18th from web

Im going to bed. 9:00 PM Jan 18th from web

Getting ready to sign out from Twitter. 9:03 PM Jan 18th from web
Signing out. 9:04 PM Jan 18th from web

From anonymous:

Someday in the future Twitter would have changed us. We would have been conditioned to speak only in 140 characters…..or less.

From mizdi:

Tweet as you like it… go ahead… have fun!

There’s something wonderful about the way Twitter makes

intelligent people blurt out brilliant nonsense and ….get away with it.

Logged out. 11:53 PM Jan 24th from Wordpress

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Tagged as: funny tweets, instant messaging, social media, Twitter